The Hand That Shakes the Papaya Tree

Have you ever been hungry and you had no money – and there’s no possibility of you getting anything to eat anytime soon?

Life can throw a lot of challenges our way, but unless you know what it feels like to be without money AND food, well.... you should just be thankful.

I’ve known once what it felt like to be that hungry. Just once. I was only around 12 then. My mom, my brother and I lived in a 2-storey apartment. We were not living in poverty; I don’t remember us ever being in that situation. But I recall, that my mom had a difficult time raising us on her own. I didn’t understand it fully then, and she tried her best to not let it affect us. She tried to give us a good life, and for the most part, we had everything we needed.

Because of this experience, I hate to see hungry people, and I can never turn my back away from a child rummaging through the garbage for food, or an old person, begging in the streets. I know what it feels like to have no options.

On that day, Ma had no money. Usually, we borrow canned goods from the store owned by our landlord, just to the side of the apartment, and that would tide us over until she got funds. She didn’t have a job you see, and she had us to take care of. She hated to leave us alone with other people, and she rarely did.

But on that particular day, the store was closed, and the 4-door apartment complex where we lived was quiet. No one was around except for our boarder, Jimmy. There was no one to borrow money from. Jimmy was always broke, that much I can remember. But what I can’t remember is why there was no one around when there were usually a lot of people in the complex.

It was a long time ago, but I remember my mom looking for ways to get us some food. She approached a neighbor on the other side of the street, to no avail. It was past lunchtime and we haven’t eaten. Back then, there were no mobile phones which you can use to reach other people right away. I’d like to think that if there were cellphones then, someone would have helped us. Since she didn’t have money, she couldn’t go anywhere. You need money for transportation. But first, you had to be sure that you will be able to get some from wherever you’re going… or else, how will you get back home?

She didn’t go anywhere that day, and I know why… the phone was also inside the store. She couldn’t call anyone for help.

It was almost evening. Still, we haven’t eaten. We were sitting outside the porch of the apartment, when Mama suddenly stood up and told us we will be having dinner soon. What went on in her mind from the time she realized there was no one to turn to, to that moment, I can only imagine. But one of the things that I loved about and learned from my Ma, is to never panic. She never said it, but that’s what I grew up observing.

Ma called Jimmy, and I don’t know what she said to him, but Jimmy left. She then asked me to meet her downstairs in front of the apartment, and to bring a chair. So, I took the plastic chair in front of the neighbor’s and waited for her. When she came outside, she was holding a knife. She took the chair from me, and placed it alongside the wall separating the other compound from ours. I wondered why… until I saw what she was doing.

There behind the wall, was a Papaya Tree, and it was bearing fruit – and my Ma was trying to shake the tree to dislodge the fruits hanging there, but had to use her knife to pick them off. What a sight it was. I wish I could remember every single detail of that day, but only that moment imprinted in my memory… and in my heart.

While sitting on the porch, contemplating how she would feed us that day, she must’ve seen that Papaya Tree. And she saw the possibility and did what she had to do… for us.

She handed some of the papayas to me as she picked them. Once we had several, she stepped down from the chair and we went up to the kitchen with our loot. She peeled the papayas and proceeded to cook “Tinola”, without the chicken. While waiting in the living room, I saw Jimmy return… with a bag of rice. He was obviously successful in finding his own papaya tree.

When the Tinola and rice were cooked, we had a good dinner together. Our hunger was satiated. She can sure cook, even if the ingredients were incomplete.

And the next day when I woke up, I found a note from my Ma saying that she’ll be back for lunch. She went out early to look for funds, I guess… because I think, we’ve picked all the papaya from that tree.

That was the only time I remembered ever being THAT hungry. I'm sure there were other times, but Ma always found some way to provide for us. How she did it, on her own, without a regular job, I don’t know. All I know was, though life was hard, we were happy most of the time. I loved to be beside her. I had all the best toys, lived in nice places, and had a good education. Sure, there were times when we were evicted from our home, times when I couldn’t take an exam in school since my tuition wasn’t paid… but what the heck? Those were just logistics. What mattered was that in between, we were happy. And all of that we owe to the hand that never hesitated to shake the Papaya Tree, so she could give us the best things she could afford.

Now that I have my own challenges to face, I remember these childhood stories more often. Maybe when things get too difficult for me, I gravitate to these memories for strength. My life is definitely easier than my mother’s, but she managed… and that thought helps me carry on when I start to weaken. I am my mother’s daughter after all. I’d like to think I am even half the woman she was to the people she loved.

What’s really important in life? Don’t you ask yourself that sometimes? We worry about so many things, most of them trivial. What should we treasure and protect? Our new car, our new cellphone? What should we value and work hard to get? To be more popular, to be surrounded by “friends”? I can’t blame you for wanting these things. These are the things people judge our success by. How much money we have, the kind of house we live in, the kind of car we drive. Yes, these things are important, but it’s not what a happy life is about.

I know people who aspired for these things, got them, and lost them. What was left when the pomp and glitter was gone? None… and no one.

Because of the lessons I learned early on in life, money problems don’t affect my happiness like other problems do. They don't break my heart or make me feel helpless. It only bothers me as much as it bothers the people I care about. After all, we do have to eat and pay the bills.

But, deep in my heart, I know with certainty that there is a Papaya Tree out there somewhere... If I looked hard enough. I just need to be determined enough to look for it.

What’s important to me, is that I have people in my life Who Will Shake the Papaya Tree when the time comes that I need them to do so. Someone who will do brave things and come to my aid when times get hard. When you have that, you can’t ask for anything more. Life becomes so much easier… and feels safer, when someone has your back. No matter what.

That was my Ma for me, when she was still alive. It’s easy to rock a cradle. But to pick the fruit of a Papaya Tree that wasn’t even yours takes courage and determination, and a steel will to do what’s necessary for the people you love.

I am forever grateful to my mother for being brave in the face of life’s challenges.

She was a real lioness, that woman.

 Treasure the people who shake the papaya tree for you.

Your husband or wife, a supportive son or daughter or family member, a good friend...

These are the things money can't buy.

Thanks for reading!
Have a happy holiday season with the people you love!